map_to_eyt_camp_2Even though we always take our gas regular at Manny, Jack and Moe’s Cut-Rate Fossil Fuels, we find that it’s taking $32 to fill up the Baristamobile — and that we’re doing it an awful lot these days. Maybe it’s because of the ridiculous little summer camp and rehearsal schedule we choreographed this spring, back when all the distances were entirely theoretical.
map_to_dreamcatchers_2In our case, the depletion of the earth’s resources is occuring in the good name of theater: with children in theatrical day camps in Montclair and South Orange, as well as a production of Les Miz in Little Falls that requires four or five evening rehearsals a week. It all amounts to about 32 miles of driving a day.
We know others, however, who are doing their thing for dependence on Middle Eastern oil in the name of traveling baseball. And there must be still more contributing to ozone depletion in the name of lacrosse, dance or tae kwon do.
Which gave us the idea for a contest. Calculate the number of miles you drive each day chauffering your rugrats around, and if you beat the Barista’s daily average of 32 miles, you’ll win a Barista mug or T-shirt! We want to know where you’re driving of course, and what kind of character-building activity you’re driving your offspring to. (Bonus points if you’re doing it for a pet and not a child.) Send your entry to and be sure to mention the word “contest” in the subject line.

6 replies on “A suburban Mom (or Dad) Gas-Guzzling Contest”

  1. I hope Mrs. Pat Kenschaft dosen’t get wind of this!
    I think the only ‘approved’ activity for kids is working in the organic garden, making soap, and creating toys and amusements out of garbage (so as not to throw it away).

  2. This brings to mind a demented bumper sticker I saw the other day….. It said “How did all of our oil get under their desert?”

  3. I wonder why (since it is our oil) we have to pay the billions that their price-fixing cartel demands?

  4. Hey, get with the program! With the weather the way it’s been, why do you think they invented the PlayStation? I can’t even compete. . .even with driving down to Florida, I haven’t hit the maximum mileage on the lease.
    This is actually kind of a reason to promote the “downtown” idea, too. The more stuff that’s close to you, the less gas and travel time you use up. Hey! Give those kid some egg cartons and a bunch of tempera paints, and sit back with a nice big Margarita. Your job here is done.

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