If Bush’s second-term swearing-in extravanganza doesn’t turn you on (and our extensive market research indicates that, for 4 out of 5 of you, it doesn’t), here’s a list of Un-Auguration activities that might strike your fancy:

  • Not One Damn Dime Day. This one came to us via Neil Baldwin, who got it from his buddy Stephen King (why pass up an opportunity to do some name dropping?) This protest asks people to try to "shut the retail economy down" as a protest of the inauguration and the war. That means no wine, no latte, and if you want to read the latest Stephen King, go to the library, not the bookstore.
  • Count Me Blue Bracelets. Don’t tell Stephen King if you go into Manhattan today to look for one of these "Count Me Blue" bracelets, being *gasp* sold for $2 as a protest against W. and his merry band.
  • Montclair’s Blue Ball. A counter-inaugural ball tonight at Just Jake’s Restaurant, across from the Montclair Y, from 7 to 10 pm. The invitation (posted on the Watercooler) asks everyone to "wear blue." We expect the requirement will be met mostly with blue jeans, but how the revelry will happen without spending one damn dime, we don’t know.
  • Counter-Inaugural Parties . If you want to cavort with fellow bluesters cashlessly, Democracy for America has a list of counter-inaugural parties somewhat nearby, including one in Livingston.
  • 17 replies on “Un-Auguration”

    1. The “Not One [expletive deleted] Dime Day” doesn’t make any sense to me. The banks, insurance companies, pharmaceutical companies and oil companies will still make money off of you if you don’t go out to shop. That is, the Republican supporters will make money. Meanwhile, you want to hurt the local retailers, who almost undoubtedly voted Democrat?
      A more effective protest would be the “Don’t Drive Your Oil Sucking SUV For the Rest of His Term” protest, wouldn’t it? Or maybe the “Invest Locally, Not in the Soul Sucking Casino that is the Stock Market” protest. Or the “Go to Church and Tell Your Minister to Stop Talking About Gays and Start Talking About Love” protest. Or recycle some cans. I don’t know, something that sticks it to the Man, not to your neighbor.

    2. “Invest Locally, Not in the Soul Sucking Casino that is the Stock Market” protest.”
      -ouch! (I owned tyco too, I feel your pain)
      For some of us today is a great day to be sure. Despite vicious attacks on his character, a hostile biased press, Mooreish lunacy, fake memos and fake conspiracies, and a histrionic opposition — a solid majority of Americans returned this great man to office.
      I wish him well and good luck. There is much left to do.
      My hope for the country is that despite our differences we can together hope for America’s success.

    3. And the dems/libs wonder why they keep losing the elections?
      How about getting a candidate worth a damn to vote for instead of just finding someone to vote against?

    4. It burns! It burns!
      (Sorry. I watched “Point Pleasant” last night. The Spawn of Satan has washed up on the Jersey shore.)

    5. Tyco. What a witchhunt. They just started the new trial after the jury hung last time. Still can’t figure out what it was that was supposedly illegal.

    6. Public Voicing Doubts on Iraq and the Economy, Poll Finds
      January 20, 2005
      On the eve of President Bush’s second inauguration, most Americans say they do not expect the economy to improve or American troops to be withdrawn from Iraq by the time Mr. Bush leaves the White House, and many have reservations about his signature plan to overhaul Social Security, according to the latest New York Times/CBS News Poll.
      Seventy percent, however, said they thought Mr. Bush would succeed in changing the Social Security system. The poll found that 43 percent of respondents expect most forms of abortion to be illegal by the time Mr. Bush leaves the White House, given Mr. Bush’s expected appointments to the Supreme Court.
      The Times/CBS News Poll offered the kind of conflicting portrait of the nation’s view of Mr. Bush that was evident throughout last year’s presidential campaign. Nearly 60 percent of respondents said they were generally optimistic on the eve of Mr. Bush’s swearing-in about the next four years, but clear majorities disapproved of Mr. Bush’s management of the economy and the war in Iraq.
      Nearly two-thirds said a second Bush term would leave the country with a larger deficit, while 47 percent said that a second Bush term would divide Americans. A majority of those surveyed said that they did not expect any improvement in health care, education, or in reducing the cost of prescription drugs for the elderly by January 2009.
      Just under 80 percent, including a majority of those who said they voted for Mr. Bush in November, said it would not be possible to overhaul Social Security, cut taxes, and finance the war in Iraq without increasing the budget deficit, despite Mr. Bush’s promises to the contrary.
      The findings, coming after a tensely competitive election, suggest that Mr. Bush does not have broad popular support as he embarks on what the White House has signaled would be an extraordinarily ambitious second term, which in many ways will commence with Mr. Bush’s swearing-in and speech on Thursday. That could undermine his leverage in Congress, where even some Republicans have expressed concern about major aspects of Mr. Bush’s Social Security plans.
      Mr. Bush’s job approval rating is at 49 percent as he heads into his second term – significantly lower than the ratings at the start of the second terms of the last two presidents who served eight years, Bill Clinton and Ronald Reagan. And 56 percent said the country has gone off on the wrong track, about as bad a rating Mr. Bush has received on this measure since entering the White House.
      More at:

    7. I got this email last week too. But I’m with Lex, why punish retailers? The economy is bad enough. A smarter offensive move would’ve been a greater “Blue” turnout at the ballot box. But as Clinton so wisely put it, “Being wrong and strong is better to most Americans than being right and weak.” Right on blockheads. Apparantly you’ve tired of eating and voted Republican.

    8. Well, you can’t change the past. I propose we organize a “Don’t Buy Gasoline for a Week” protest. This may require some planning ahead, public transportation and carpooling, but if everyone in the area who voted Dem did this, it would almost certainly make the national news and have a strong multi-faceted message against big oil, the war in Iraq, a wrong-headed energy strategy, a wrong-headed environmental policy and not being allowed to pump your own.

    9. Ohmigod! I am so glad that I am not eating or drinking anything right now! I just saw the Barista’s reference to a Montclair Blue Ball and just, well…just put an “s” on the end and you’ll see what I mean. Yes, my mind is in the gutter and I am laughing hysterically!

    10. Blue Ball is a town in Amish country, one that frternity pledges are regularly sent to with the assignment to steal signs. Along with Intercourse, PA and Climax, NY. That said, it’d be nice to have Lex and his friends off the road for a week (or more). But it would also sorely hurt all those Russian, Indian, Pakistani and Bangladeshi immigrants who work so hard, and such long hours, at service stations in pursuit of their share of the American dream. Tell me, Lex, have you ever pumped gas yourself? Given a customer a quart of oil? Wiped windshields? (Okay, that one is rare today.)

    11. Well, Lex, you still didn’t tell us if you’ve ever pumped gas. worked in a convenience store, swept out movie theaters at the cineplex, etc. And of course I care about the poor and the underprivleged, I’m a compassionate conservative. Surely you’ve heard of that breed?

    12. A liberal and a conservative are walking along a street when a homeless man comes up to panhandle them.
      The conservative says to the man “Why don’t you come around my business tomorrow and I’ll pay you to do some sweeping” and then reaches in his wallet and gives the man $20.
      The Liberal appologizes to the homeless man for being oppressed, tells him where to apply for food stamps and then reaches into the wallet of his conservative friend and gives the homless man $20.

    13. In honor of the “campassionate conservative” and since Friday is poetry day in Baristaville, Fit the Eighth from Lewis carroll’s “The Hunting of the Snark”:
      Fit the Eighth
      They sought it with thimbles, they sought it with care;
      They pursued it with forks and hope;
      They threatened its life with a railway-share;
      They charmed it with smiles and soap.
      They shuddered to think that the chase might fail,
      And the Beaver, excited at last,
      Went bounding along on the tip of its tail,
      For the daylight was nearly past.
      “There is Thingumbob shouting!” the Bellman said,
      “He is shouting like mad, only hark!
      He is waving his hands, he is wagging his head,
      He has certainly found a Snark!”
      They gazed in delight, while the Butcher exclaimed
      “He was always a desperate wag!”
      They beheld him–their Baker–their hero unnamed–
      On the top of a neighboring crag.
      Erect and sublime, for one moment of time.
      In the next, that wild figure they saw
      (As if stung by a spasm) plunge into a chasm,
      While they waited and listened in awe.
      “It’s a Snark!” was the sound that first came to their ears,
      And seemed almost too good to be true.
      Then followed a torrent of laughter and cheers:
      Then the ominous words “It’s a Boo-”
      Then, silence. Some fancied they heard in the air
      A weary and wandering sigh
      Then sounded like “-jum!” but the others declare
      It was only a breeze that went by.
      They hunted till darkness came on, but they found
      Not a button, or feather, or mark,
      By which they could tell that they stood on the ground
      Where the Baker had met with the Snark.
      In the midst of the word he was trying to say,
      In the midst of his laughter and glee,
      He had softly and suddenly vanished away—
      For the Snark *was* a Boojum, you see.

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