Baristanet proudly welcomes its newest advertiser: the Red Cheetah, Montclair’s most “high class” martini lounge. In a press release to announce the new association, Cheetah CEO Ed Rodriguez said,

“LOL. deez guys are nuts. i am advertising just having some fun isnt that what life is about fun meeting new friends dancing laughing. I thot these guys were hoplessly unkool but i was rong, but even if they r they could rilly rock this club! live love ed.

dress code still enforced.”


“Ed, we’re glad you got a PR person,” said Baristanet co-editor Liz George. “We look forward to a long and mutually fruitful relationship (psst… for an extra $1000 a month, we’ll throw in press release proofreading services.).”

20 replies on “Now Can We Sit In The VIP Lounge?”

  1. Yeah, should we walk in enmasse showing solidarity for our beloved barista? I need to work on my dance hall moves…oh,oh,oh, stayin alive…stayin alive.

  2. I think we should all submit out names to baristanet so we can be on a “list” that way we can shake our behinds in the faces of those who can’t just cut the line to get in. We have to say “I’m on the VIP list” and WINK an exaggerated wink to all those still waiting.

  3. Today starts the 8th annual Tartan week in NYC. So, cathar, any recipes for us to try aside from putting ice cubes in a glass, add scotch and shake?

  4. Late,
    I am soliciting designers to see who wants to outfit me for the show. So far it’s only carhart overalls and Haband slacks.

  5. start here:
    sacfree® protects and supports your dong in a bag-like pouch.
    So far sacfree® still feels like a normal slip. But for your testicles there is nothing but liberty. Through a recess your balls can hang down easily. This results in the revolutionary sacfree® feeling.
    And the most important: No bothering fumbling by fitting on.

  6. Or is it a “Dance Club Martin & Lounge”?
    Either way I want to know what’s up with this Martin guy.

  7. Iceman, you’re never supposed to shake a single malt. It’ll “bruise.” You simply pour it very gently over a few cubes.
    There is a recipe for what’s called “athol brose,” which basically calls for blended Scotch (Teacher’s Highland Cream or The Famous Grouse would both work), honey and oatmeal (sometimes milk, too). But it’s really a cold weather potation. Hence the oatmeal. Fine way to start a winter’s day, however, and to send the wee bairns off to school while you head for the kirk. Goes well with haggis (which I’ve never found all that revolting).

  8. cathar,
    i thought that to release the flavour one was supposed to add a drop of water in the scotch whilst gently shaking the glass?

  9. Never heard that one, Iceman. Maybe, but instead of “shaking” the glass I suspect real Gaelic rummies would tell you to gently swirl the whisky in it. With or without the little bit of water, to be sure.

  10. I like Haggis.
    We go every January to Argyles in Kearny to celebrate Robert Burns Day, complete with the reading of “Ode to a Haggis” libral toasts abound and then samples of haggis for all.

  11. The spelling is horrendous yet hilarious at the same time. Martin lounge! Still cracking up over here.

  12. The true test of a haggis lover, Anne Prince, might be that he or she has it more than once a year. And without the “wee dram” that for many makes it tolerable. (In a full serving, too, rather than a sample.)
    I think of it as a type of occasionally okay sausage, something tourists order more often than locals in a true offal hive like Glasgow. I always bring some back for presents when I go to Scotland. But it’s also now made more bearable for folks in that it comes in flavors (kind of like “martinis” do, and probably similar sacrilege). Even in vegetarian versions. Which of course removes the elements of haggis so offensive to many.

  13. Why did my original post get deleted here? I don’t recall what it said, other than calling attention to the “Martin” typo?

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