The week in Montclair Crime from D/Lt. Francis Muldoon, Montclair Police Department:
Theft, Vandalism, Mischief:
03-31-2016 (ReallyBrite Cleaners, 390 1/2 Park Street) At 12:45Hrs, a female suspect entered brandishing a 24-inch diameter crepe (no filling) and proceeded to fling the food item at a male employee. While the man struggled to remove the sticky hot crepe, the actor jumped behind the counter, forced open the cash register with a metal spatula and removed approximately $200.
03-22-2016 (Alexander Place) Theft of two bicycles from a residential garage. One actor, Seth Culpepper, dropped his wallet at the scene. Police went to Mr. Culpepper’s residence, arrested him and recovered one of the bikes.
03-23-2016 (Clinton Avenue) Theft of numerous tools from a garage. “Tim Allen was here” was spray-painted on the door.
03-29-2016 (Kings Supermarket, Valley Road) A man was arrested for stealing produce. The actor was observed stuffing his cargo pants with grapes before trying to walk out of the store.
03-25-2016 (Orange Road) Vandalism to a house undergoing renovations. An uninvited stranger installed mauve curtains in a room painted pea green. Homeowners called to report the decorating violation.
03-25-2016 (Essex Avenue) A gift wrapped refrigerator box was left on the porch of a house with a card that said: “For their return home, the Greeks dedicate this offering to Athena.” The homeowners were suspicious because they did not order an appliance. When police arrived they opened the box, found a man inside, Odie Thanassus, and arrested him for criminal mischief.
I am guessing this is an April Fools joke thrown in here: 03-25-2016 (Orange Road) Vandalism to a house undergoing renovations. An uninvited stranger installed mauve curtains in a room painted pea green. Homeowners called to report the decorating violation.
actually more than 1!
Love the Car 54 reference.
The mauve curtains made me laugh out loud (which was bad because I was at work). Your April Fool’s Day posts always make my day.