DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

The formerly “moderate” Republican congressman who represents Upper Montclair now votes with the far right, hasn’t held an in-person town hall in years, didn’t attend any of the great town halls NJ 11th for Change held last week, and prefers public appearances at private schools. When will Rodney Frelinghuysen interact more with his other 11th District constituents?

Sincerely,
No Ifs, Ands, or Guts

Eagerly awaiting his smoke-signal town hall!

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

Is that a satirical poke at the Trump-supporting Rodney’s clunky, little-advance-notice, inconveniently-timed, only-some-questions-answered telephone town halls?

Sincerely,
Bored of the Rings

For which taxpayers fund the tin cans and strings.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

Elsewhere in Montclair, the Planning Board met Feb. 22 to discuss plans for the allegedly arts-oriented complex on/near Seymour Street. Why haven’t you warmed up to that way-too-big project?

Sincerely,
The Arts of the Deal

It’ll make downtown Montclair feel like Manhattan, even though I can’t find a Bloomfield Avenue subway entrance. Might be one under the Clairidge Theater’s popcorn machine.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

The Planning Board also met Feb. 27 to discuss a developer’s plan to raze the 1906 architectural gem at 44 Pleasant Avenue (where famous African-American resident Aubrey Lewis lived) and replace it with EIGHT pricey homes. If that happens, there will be…

Sincerely,
The Demon Greed

…another piece of local history lost, lovely trees cut down, less open space, more traffic, more students crowding our schools, and a street renamed Unpleasant Avenue. Sort of like Dercliff Road became Undercliff Road.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

At the Board of Education’s Feb. 27 meeting, we sadly heard about a possible $1.8-million shortfall in the district’s 2017-18 budget. Comment?

Sincerely
Depressing Dollar Deficit

I despise the state-mandated cap limiting local tax hikes to 2% because that can force educator layoffs. It’s Gov. Christie who should be fired — so, “Frozen” fans, please join me in singing: “Let him go, let him go…”

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

And if Montclair lays off much-needed paraprofessionals, the district could lose those “savings” by having to fund more out-of-district placements for special-needs students. “Penny-wise and pound-foolish”?

Sincerely,
Cliche Stadium

Your use of a tired catchphrase explains why your bored cat is currently reciting the Gettysburg Address.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

The next BOE budget meeting is March 6 — the same day school tours start! Which middle school will your fourth-grader eventually attend?

Sincerely,
Ella Mentary

We’ve narrowed it down to Buzz Aldrin, Glenfield, Renaissance, and Hogwarts.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

If an 11th District resident wrote a J.K. Rowling-like novel set in America’s Republican-controlled House of Representatives, what might be its title?

Sincerely,
Debbie Harry Potter

“Rodney Frelinghuysen and the Chamber of Doom.”

 

 

 Dave Astor is the MontClairVoyant. His opinions about politics and local events are strictly his own and do not represent or reflect the views of Baristanet.