DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

The second and third floors of Montclair’s library reopened for browsing July 16, and the third floor is of course the children’s section. What does that mean?

Sincerely,

Forever Youngsters

It means that children’s book characters are running around that big room — seeing visitors again, saying hello to them, creating mischief, hoping for a Baristanet mention…

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

Mission accomplished. How did those fictional characters end up outside the pages of the books they populate?

Sincerely,

It’s Not…Usual

Montclair’s nearby downtown restaurants were a draw, but the characters are having trouble leaving the library’s third floor. Too short to reach the elevator button, I guess.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

Did that frustrate The Very Hungry Caterpillar as it crawled around the children’s section?

Sincerely,

Worm Limits

You’re assuming that Eric Carle’s caterpillar is very hungry. The book’s “The Very Hungry Caterpillar” title gives no indication of that.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

I understand The Cat in the Hat is also among the characters running amok on the library’s third floor. What’s that cartoon felon…um…feline doing in addition to creating chaos?

Sincerely,

On the Loose from Dr. Seuss

Announcing that Thing One and Thing Two will run for Township Council seats in 2024. Their slogan: “We know a thing or two about Montclair.”

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

Madeline would also consider running for local office, but she’s a kid and usually lives in France so she’s not eligible. What should Ludwig Bemelmans’ character do instead?

Sincerely,

French Small Fry

When roaming the third-floor shelves, Madeline muttered something about walking “in two straight lines.” Maybe she’ll counsel a few Montclair drivers taking sobriety tests.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

Pippi Longstocking skateboarded across that library floor with a big smile on her face. Why was Astrid Lindgren’s character so happy?

Sincerely,

It’s the Wheel Thing

Either she was pleased with the Council passing a resolution for a permanent skate park in Rand Park, or a judge ruled that she can change her weird name.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

The boy in Shel Silverstein’s “The Giving Tree” also looked pleased while sitting in the children’s section. How come?

Sincerely,

Not Named Sue

It’s because the Montclair Public Library Foundation has a new executive director: Mary Packer. The MPLF is a sort of Giving Tree, and some donors live on Forest Street.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

One character, Cassie from “Tar Beach,” did manage to exit our town’s library via the roof. What happened after that?

Sincerely,

Off the Beach

Having soared over New York City in Faith Ringgold’s book, the girl tried to also soar over Montclair — only to be blocked by The MC’s too-tall building. An unfortunate boutique-hotel experience.

DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

Is the falling-asleep bunny from “Goodnight Moon” in Montclair’s library, too?

Sincerely,

Margaret (Very) Wise Brown

This is how it went down: “Goodnight comb/goodnight brush/goodnight nobody/goodnight mush/and goodnight to the old lady whispering…’HOW CAN YOU SLEEP WHEN IN A COLUMN THIS SILLY?'”

 

 

Dave Astor, author, is the MontClairVoyant. His opinions about politics and local events are strictly his own and do not represent or reflect the views of Baristanet.