DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

Your thoughts on Montclair High’s graduation night last Thursday, June 22?

Sincerely,

Comfortably Alum

A great evening! The words, the diplomas, the weather, the bus parade, etc. But the hot dogs served were NOT a centennial tribute to Agatha Christie’s 1923 mystery “Murder on the Links.”


DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

That novel was more about golf than hot-dog links. Still, there WAS a bit of a downer at commencement — not enough seats for ticket-holders. Hasn’t that happened before?

Sincerely,

Early Summer Bummer

Yup, including the year my older daughter graduated Montclair High and I had to watch on video. I’m hoping the problem will be resolved by 2123, when Agatha Christie writes “Murder in the Afterlife.”


DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

It’s still a bit of a mystery when Lackawanna Plaza’s future will be decided and how much needed downsizing will be in the plan. Your thoughts?

Sincerely,

Project Produation

Part of me wants a final decision put off until there’s a new Township Council next year. Lots of dysfunction, ineptitude, or cronyism among some of the current council and some of its appointees — though admittedly the Montclair council of 2023 BC also had some issues.


DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

The Montclair council didn’t exist more than 4,000 years ago, but, assuming it did, what issues did it have?

Sincerely,

Ancient Ambience

For one thing, it was slow to fully ban gas-powered dinosaur blowers. Those machines were loud and polluting, and, to tell the truth, aiming blowers at dinosaurs wasn’t a humane way to “drive” them to school.


DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

Pretty sure dinosaurs were extinct long before 2023 BC. Two days after the 2023 AD commencement came Montclair’s postponed Juneteenth festival. Comment?

Sincerely,

Hillside Happening

It was a terrific June 24 event. I’ll add that Black history should of course be remembered 365 days a year — and 366 days in 2024 because of inflation.


DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

Because of Leap Year, you mean. I’ll now ask about Independence Day, with the hope that you “up” your historical knowledge game. What is our town remembering this Tuesday, July 4?

Sincerely,

Tom S. Jefferson

After experiencing Montclair’s lovely “Make Music Day” on June 21, 2023, we’ll remember the 1770s British Invasion that predated The Beatles and other 1960s English bands from “across the pond.”


DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

Edgemont Pond? Your historical recollections are getting even weirder, though Montclair’s Independence Day picnic WILL be in Edgemont Park following our town’s renowned parade. Looking forward to the parade’s diversity?

Sincerely,

Red, White, and Mountie Blue

Yup, and the old cars — though I dread a future when Montclair becomes so affluent that the parade will be a procession of priceless 1930s Duesenbergs. By the way, “A Procession of Priceless 1930s Duesenbergs” would NOT be a good name for a rock band.


DEAR MONTCLAIRVOYANT,

Circling back to Agatha Christie, what was “And Then There Were None” about?

Sincerely,

As I Head to the Local Library

That novel was about the U.S. Census of 65 million years ago suddenly finding no more dinosaurs in Montclair.

 

 

Dave Astor, author, is the MontClairVoyant. His opinions about politics and local events are strictly his own and do not represent or reflect the views of Baristanet.